Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Lessons From My Daughter

Yesterday my husband did something that hurt all of our feelings (and I am sure that there have been more than enough times that I have done the same). The girls were very loving and affectionate towwards him even though they had just been hurt by him. They were excited that he was with them and wanted to be with him.

Later that night, while he was playing checkers with our oldest, he came in the room and said that he felt distant from everyone, everyone except our oldest.

I had to think about that. Why would he feel distant from me and not from our oldest?

Then I realized that I was uncourisouly pushing him away by the fact that I was not going out of my way to be with him. My oldest wanted to play games with him. She wanted to hug and kiss him. She wanted his company and showed it.

I, on the other hand, didn't want to kiss or hug him. I didn't want to play a game with him (although I would have if he asked). I didn't want his company, although I would have been fine if he were in the room. My daughter sought him out to be with him, and I just did my own thing and if he was there, that was fine.

I did all the right things that I couldl think of:
I didn't nag him like I usually do.
I didn't rub in the wrong he had done.
I didn't try to correct him.
I didn't play the Holy Spirit.

But there were things I should have done that I didn't:
I should not have acted so hurt, but shouldl have been more joyful.
I should have loved on him more.
I should have let him know that I enjoy his company.

Learning to love my husband is a process that is lieflong! We have been married almost 9 years and I am still learning to love him as I should and as he needs.

1 comment:

Dawn said...

Paula,

I can definately relate to this post! Thanks for sharing!

Faithfully,

Dawn