So Much More

So for two days now, no mess ups!! Of course, hubby has been working longer hours which means less time together, which means less time for me to mess up. LOL!

It is amazing how much JOY I have in my life. And how much desire and LOVE I have for my husband since reading this book! I have been very convicted and realize just how far I have to go, but all in all, I feel that I now have the tools to make me a better help meet and mother. Beforehand, I just knew that I should be submissive, but didn't really know how. And couldn't really tell when I blew it. But now, I can tell when I blow it (before my dh has to tell me) and can ask forgiveness and change things.

And I never thought that a deeper desire and love for my husband would pop up as a result of this. But that verse in Genesis pops in my head: Gen 3:16 "Your desire shall be for your husband." He is now my desire. I not only desire him physically, but I also desire to please him and serve him and make his life as easy and pleasureable as possible.

I almost cry when I think of all the years I wasted being what I thought was submissive, but was actually digging an early grave for my husband. I feel like I used to be rotteness to his bones. I can look back and even see where my unsubmission and not being a help meet actually caused strained relationships between him and his family. And caused him to think poorly of himself. It is amazing how easily one can think they are being submissive because she is doing what the church ladies say is submission. I am so thankful I have been drawn to God's word as the standard for what it means to be submissive.

But there is so much more to being a help meet than just being submissive. I never realized that before. I always thought if I was being submissive, I was filling my God given role. But God never gave the woman a role of being submissive. He gave her the role of being a help meet - THAT is why she was created. And I was missing the mark by focusing only on submission. That is one tiny (but very important) part of the whole picture.